GM Ready For A Comeback

As US automaker, Government Motors, is having it’s investigative wing -- The US Transportation Department -- look into new brake problems that have been discovered in the Toyota Prius, GM’s Board of Directors -- The US Congress -- prepares to dictate terms to Toyota on whether they can continue to operate in the United States.

Asking to remain anonymous, a spokesmen for Government Motors was quoted as saying, “We’ve got ‘em right where we want them. With the full financial backing of the US Government, we were able to dismantle any real competition from Ford, since Ford has to actually worry about who they make loans to and we don’t. After all, our loans are backed by the US taxpayer and their's aren’t.

Now with the full backing of the US Congress, we will be able to use the safety angle to destroy any real competition from Toyota, as well.

Capitalism was too annoying with all that pesky competition to worry about, but now that industry has joined hands with government, we can finally dominate the market with our new-found consumer-friendly fascism. With these obstacles out of the way, GM is finally set to rebound and dominate the market.”